@wittybigtwittys: Friends are like trampolines. I've always wanted a trampoline.
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@VerbsRProudest: Never underestimate mothers. They can turn "mayhem" into "ma'am" with one narrowed glance.
@AsgardianRose: Every kiss begins with 'K' I whisper quietly to myself as I read his one letter response to my last 7 text messages.
@KalvinMacleod: [pet therapy] THERAPIST: ok slow ME: *pets 2 dogs* T: just 1 M: *pets 3 dogs* T: Nurse, restrain him, he’s M: *pets 4 dogs* T: roverdosing