@bmarked21: From now on when people forcefully show me pictures of their baby, I'm simply going to reply, "Hmm... I've seen better."
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@causticbob: I dig, you dig, we dig, he digs, she digs, they dig. It's not a beautiful poem, but it's very deep.
@ieatanddrink: Dating tip: Girls like guys who takes control. Pick up a horse and ask "Where should I put this horse?" When she tells you, say no
@joeljeffrey: My wife and did it twice yesterday and we didn't use any protection... I'm worried we might have twins.
@weedhitler: THIS IS THE COPS. WE KNOW YOU HAVE NWA'S "FU*CK THE POLICE" ON REPEAT IN THERE. COME OUT & SAY SORRY TO OFFICER DAVIS. YOU MADE HIM CRY DUDE