@weinerdog4life: Fun Date Idea: Find a balloon, forget about the date, you have a balloon now.
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@darinlovesbacon: Your honor I object! That other lawyer is saying stuff that makes my client look guilty
@carlyken: Jesus take the wheel. No that's a book. A penny. A rock. DAMMIT JESUS DIDN'T YOU TAKE THAT ENGLISH AS A SECOND LANGUAGE CLASS I RECOMMENDED
@UncleDuke1969: Buying my parents' house. Soon, like so many of the 'ladies' here... I too will be a middle aged man tweeting from his mom's basement.