@1followernodad: Fun prank: ONLY explain gay marriage to your kids and then watch other people try to explain their weird straight marriages.
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@evildadatron: Maybe the Loch Ness Monster is really just giraffes that don't want people to know they like to swim YOU DON'T KNOW
@StinkyGr33n: My co-worker said he's bleeding out of his ear. "That time of the month?" I replied. He's not amused.
@maisonwithapen: HIM: isn't wintertime just so romantic ME (smiles & my lips crack open & blood starts pouring down my chin): oh definitely
@Rollinintheseat: Why do authors subtitle their books, "A Novel". Did someone look at their book one day and say "I thought this was a sandwich?"