@trims_the_fat: Funny how people get all angry when you break something of their's that they don't ever use. Like turn signals with a baseball bat.
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@KrazykurtKurt: I usually spend my Sundays texting apologies but I've had an alcohol free weekend now I have nothing to do.
@Brentweets: "Fluffy died today" "Oh my god I'm so sorry, was he a cat or dog? "He was a boa constrictor" "Well that made me feel better"