@LiftHeavyAndRun: @funTweeters you guys are my favorite thing about Twitter. I suggest we get pant less and hug this out like men.
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@NYC_Blonde: I wish I was a baby so I could pass out in public with a bottle and no one would look twice.
@KimmyMonte: Your Honor the defense rests. They are so tired. Aww they look like angels when they sleep. Kinda makes u forget about the double homicide
@robdelaney: Steve Jobs' entire legacy is invalidated by the shortness of the iPhone charger's cord.
@AaronFullerton: A fun dream I have is to stand in the middle of Comic-Con, yell "What's so cool about Star Wars anyway?", then jetpack through the ceiling.