@Spaziotwat: [On The Cross] Jesus:"Father, forgive them, fore they know no-" Voice from the crowd:"DO THE WINE TRICK"

@DaddyJew: Your son has been suspended "for what?" He hit a kid who was picking on another child "so what, yall ran out of ice cream to give him?"

@Jaywoo74: If you don't think of 50 different ways to murder your boss every morning on your drive to work you're probably the boss

@tipseybartender: Are you smarter than a 5th grader? Wait... Regular or Asian?

@iinkedZombie: My daughter wanted a Cinderella themed birthday party, so I invited All of her Friends over and made them clean the house.