@gianni_bcn: *Gets disqualified for biting opponent's ear on a chess tournament*
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@Ristolable: I like my women like I like my coffee. I look at coffee but I am afraid to talk to it
@nikkithecanuck: I must admit, my "Kiss Me, I Have The Zika Virus" T-shirt is giving me a lot of personal space inside this subway car.
@jakehightower34: Oompa Loompa: When you die do we get the factory? Wonka: No, I'll just invite 5 random kids and murder 4. Oompa Loompa: We need a union...