@hazelmotes1: *gets fired the first day on the job as an EMT for trying to cook a frozen burrito with the defibrillator*
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@OtherDanOBrien: ME: I've expressed this political opinion so clearly, there's no way anyone could misinterpret it. THE INTERNET: lmao challenge accepted
@_ElvishPresley_: [commercial for boiling water] *enemies at castle wall are splashed with cool refreshing water* castle guard: there must be a better way!
@SarcasticAlly12: You know in a video game when you kept pushing b to get through the talking part but later realized you should've read it? That's adulthood.
@garrettbarry70: If by mathematician you mean dividing the number of snacks in my car by the number of miles I need to drive, then yes, I'm a mathematician.