@kelkulus: Girl asked me if I wanted to watch a "romcom" so I'm going to assume she means "Roman Combat" and put on Gladiator.
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@TheToddWilliams: [Jedi Training] TRAINER: Any questions? STUDENT: Can the Force be with me? TRAINER: I don't know...CAN it? STUDENT: Oh right...May the Force
@osigat: <- I've been drinking for almost 6 hours. If you see something wash up on shore that looks like this, please identify me.
@JD_KC: The lady helping my wife design a dining room table handed me a note reading "blink if you're being held against your will"