@SaddleLawman: Give em an enchilada, they'll take a milechilada.
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@man_spach: My Ebola outbreak brings the CDC to the yard and they're like, sir that's just irritable bowel syndrome.
@khook32: Last Christmas I gave you my heart and the very next day you gave it away! Well grandma, that's how organ donation works.
@TheDjinnTrials: Twitter is an invention created by aliens so we don't notice the period of time missing when they take us for experimentation.