@TheMichaelRock: Go home North Korea, you're drunk.
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@Robert_Beau: At Dairy Queen: Me: Medium Heath Blizzard please. DQ: You wanna spoon? Me: Sure, when do you get off?
@Moldy_Jellybean: Buying a smart car seems like a good idea until you hit a squirrel and flip over a few times.
@jctwritesstuff: Judging from my reflection in the mirror this morning, I too should not be fed after midnight.