@LuckoftheDraw86: God invented co-workers to remind us that dying alone wouldn't be such a bad thing.
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@thereverendcink: I suffer from paranoia and procrastination. Everyone is out to get me, just not right now
@Black__Elvis: If I had a daughter I wouldn't waste money on training bras, I'd trap wild bras and train them myself like our ancestors did.
@TheRolo: [Ouija board] Me: Demon? I-W-I-L-L-E-A-T-Y-O-U-R-E-S-O-U-L Me: *your Y-O-U-K-N-O-W W-H-A-T-I-D-O-N-T-W-A-N-T-Y-O-U-R-S-O-U-L-A-N-Y-M-O-R-E