@TheRealStanLee: Gonna put this up there and let it sink in...
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@WildeThingy: I used to think alcohol silenced the voices in my head until I realised it had just moved them to my mouth.
@thenatewolf: *on a first date* Me: [remembering how my friend said women like mysterious men] my favorite color is a secret
@Sirrruh: Bear: *lowers sunglasses. Is it *beary* serious? Cops:...Ok that's funny but but you mauled a child so yes. You have to go back to the zoo.
@mikejanson2: Q: How do you find Will Smith in the snow? A: You look for the fresh prints! I'll show myself out y'all