@Sickayduh: Good cop: WHAT ARE YOU DOING - HE WAS UNARMED
Dog cop: *plants a vacuum cleaner on body*
@Fred_Delicious: [goes to museum of fine art]
"Just how fine can this art be, anyway"
[sees a vase in a thong]
@bossy_bootz: Sorry if my tweets aren't good enough for you, person who retweets Cher
@thejessbess: I'm rubber. You're glue.
I don't conduct low voltage electricity. You're great for arts & crafts.
@markydoodoo: [rooster sits down in barber chair]
Give me a cockadoodledo
@robyn_vo: Watched the movie Gravity tonight. Didn't see as much gravity as I expected. Two thumbs down based on that.