@heatherlou_: Got 3 boxes of tampons, Midol & Ibuprofen at the store. Checker was so scared he paid for my shit & carried it out for me.
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@Chelsea_Elle: Lost my car keys so I'm forcing the guy at Home Depot to make me new ones based on what I remember about them.
@Chumpstring: Keep a few cat turds in your pockets, just in case a cop searches you. He will get cat poop on his hands, and you can laugh. It's all legal.
@Rollmaninoz: Growing up, mum was always like a beautiful bird. She would fly away and when she returned many hours later she would puke everywhere.