@kiralc: "Got any drugs or alcohol on you?"
"yup, I'm all set. Thanks Officer"
@LoveNLunchmeat: You can't always get what you want, but if you cry loud enough you'll at least have the satisfaction of making everyone really uncomfortable
IAN: I only regret the things I didn't do
ME: Me too
I: Like, I didn't swim with dolphins. You?
M: I didn't stop poking a bear
@hunz74: Why is childbirth called "delivery" and not "take out?"
@theshantilly: Be kind to strangers. One of them could end up being your coroner.
@Erroneous_Me: I hate my job, but it pays for my alcohol, and I need the alcohol, because I hate my job.