@TheTweetOfGod: Great news! Chipotle is giving out thousands of free burritos tomorrow! That means I’ll be seeing thousands of you by this weekend!
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@BellaBurnley: My ex bf called me today. I answered by screaming "HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE?!?!" and hung up. Should make him wonder a lil bit.
@jordan_stratton: Remember--the only thing standing between you and your dreams is your appearance, lack of talent, and general personality.
@Aspersioncast: What doesn't kill you leaves you feeling rejected and wondering why you weren't good enough for death.