@Rollmaninoz: Growing up, mum was always like a beautiful bird. She would fly away and when she returned many hours later she would puke everywhere.
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@MarfSalvador: Reporter: Is it true you delivered a pig with TWO heads?! Farmer: Yes I did Farmer's second head: WE did
@bridger_w: Yelp review: Excellent food, friendly service. That said, I did notice a smudge on a window and was forced to set the building on fire
@novicefather: You say my obsession with Justin Bieber tore us apart but I say my momma don't like you and she likes everyone.