@damakattack: Guys love legs. Women, if you can grow more legs that would be a major turn on
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@thatcarlygirl: "Please don't do this," I beg, as the hairdresser tries to start up another conversation.
@TheBoydP: The hardest part of being a dog is not understanding why squirrels don’t want to play with you.
@markleggett: I just whispered "Come at me, bro" to a bug and it ran towards me, so now I'm in my car driving away from my old life.