@SeanINCypress: Gyms are full of people that haven't found the right couch.
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@RuinMyWeek: It took me 20 minutes and a terribly bruised wrist to realize that this slap bracelet is actually a ruler.
@rablivingstone: People in the UK eat more bananas than monkeys. In 2014 they ate 73,432,384 bananas and only 6 monkeys.
@rickkondell: It's nice that my vacuum has a headlight just in case I want to clean in the dark or wake my dog up thinking he's getting hit by a train.