@DonQuickoats: Hair so long she accidentally flushed herself down the toilet
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ThaJawn: *googles murder tips *adds "asking for a friend" at the end of each search They won't be able to prove a thing! *evil cackles
@anylaurie16: Changed ex's name in my cell to Do Not Engage. Unfortunately, his middle name Not doesn't show up when he texts.
@laureneoneal: Why doesn't anyone invite copyeditors to parties when we're such cool people out with whom to hang?