@LeonEarlgrey: Haloween is over, but i just saw a group of people dressed up as the ghosts of the Cone Heads.
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@brunopieroni: Not to jinx this, but last time there was a highly anticipated London wedding on TV, the groom said Rachel's name instead.
@golub: 'Brexit' to be followed by Grexit. Departugal. Italeave. Fruckoff. Czechout. Oustria. Finish. Slovakout. Latervia. Byegium.
@SortaBad: If you get a tattoo with words, and there is a misspelling, just get a red squiggly line added underneath it and everything's cool
@markedly: *storms out of office bathroom* *slams roll of single-ply toilet paper on boss's desk* I CAN'T WORK LIKE THIS