@JayDee422: Hash browns not tags.
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@INDlAN_: If you think it hurts to lose a boyfriend/girlfriend, you've clearly never lost close to 500 GB's worth of data on your hard drive.
@DaddyJew: Girl: do you have a condom? Me: c'mon what's the worst that could happen *hears a knock on the door 4: daddy I think I started a fire
@StarksWeek: "I put on pants for nothing" - my 10 yo after she got dressed and her soccer game was cancelled. Someone set up her Twitter account.
@heidi420x: Playing dead in the supermarket to avoid having a conversation with someone you know attracts more attention than I anticipated...go figure.