@JayCee302: Haters gonna hate, thermometers gonna thermom
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@pizza_dragon: "I'm so pissed I could punch a ba-" "A what?" Big Baby from Toy Story 3 hovers over me, sawed-off shotgun in hand. "A bagel. I HATE carbs."
@HughGoesThere: [first date] me: so, what's your biggest fear? her: snakes. i hate snakes me: (whispering to the mongoose in my vest pocket): she's the one
@TheToddWilliams: [first date] HER: I totally love Nirvana ME: Oh yeah? Name one of their albums HER: Nevermind ME Okay, forget about it then