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@JayCee302: Haters gonna hate, thermometers gonna thermom
@Uzzywuzzy: Twitter is a beautiful place sometimes.
@FxckManny: Me: Send me pics
Girl: What you wanna see ;)
Girl: What ?
@YoungNobler: #wecanlandonacometbutwecant let a comet land on us. - Yakov Smirnoff
@shwebby3: Anytime I see a motorcyclist weaving in and out of traffic and performing tricks
I always root for the pavement
@HpHubert: Apparently, you can only say "Look at you! You got so big!" to kids.
Old girlfriends tend to get offended.