@MoistPork: Have your tribal tattoo call my tramp stamp and let's make beautiful, douchey babies together.
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@gneicco: Great. Ban gay marriage. Remember what happened during Prohibition? Now we're going to have everyone making bathtub gay marriages.
@Bacon_Ball: You can tell a lot by the way a woman walks. Like if she walks away, she's probably not into you.
@OrignalceQueen: When I was your age, I was outside all day until dark 15: The batteries on cell phones must have been a lot better back then Me: .........
@kellysdf: According to the NSA, most of my calls are me saying, "I forgot what you told me to pick up at the store."