@MensHumor: Having a tan is attractive. Having skin sponsored by Doritos isn't.
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@BoomBoomBetty: Selfie attempt: come hither look Selfie result: looks like I'm staring into a sandstorm
@djdarrellripley: Her: She's too young for you. Me: Based on what? Her: Based on the number of times the Earth has orbited the sun since she was born.. Me: