@Nrvous1: Having an Internet girlfriend is easier than having a real girlfriend because I don't have to suck my gut in.
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@PMTheron1: How much for the best friend? Manager : Sir, we've been through this, our cashiers aren't for sale.
@thenatewolf: *Interrogation room w/ murderer* I'd start talking, my partner isn't so nice... *From under the table I raise a puppet dressed as a cop*
@PastorBate: [Spelling Bee] Your word is palindrome "Can you use it in a sentence?" Go hang a salami I'm a lasagna hog.