@_Tempo11: He said he wanted to "put more than just words in my mouth" and I was like "I hope you mean hamburgers."
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@dafloydsta: [marriage counseling] She thinks I make bad decisions "He picked a fight with a raccoon" HE LOOKED LIKE A CRIMINAL, KAREN
@flashember: *caterpillar looks up at sky* "My dream is to fly a plane one day." Other Caterpillar: You don't pay any attention in science class, do you?