@AndyRichter: HEADLINE: Recent Studies Show Old White Dudes Possibly Becoming Obsolete. "This is bad for everybody," say Old White Dudes.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@GrantTanaka: A good way to break up with a girl is to leave her a trail of rose petals starting from her front door to North Korea.
@KalvinMacleod: Day 3 of weight loss challenge: all my coworkers look like tacos. I do not understand how the meat remains in the shell as they walk around.
@DallyDoll: I was kicked out of the gym for arguing with my step aerobics instructor, but I don't care. She's not my real aerobics instructor.
@ArfMeasures: [Drives date home] ME [stops and revs engine sexily] I had a great time tonight DATE: [climbs off my lawnmower] I did not