@AndyRichter: HEADLINE: Recent Studies Show Old White Dudes Possibly Becoming Obsolete. "This is bad for everybody," say Old White Dudes.
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@KKAlThani: I wouldn't take a bullet for you but I'd definitely push someone in front of you to take it for you. Same thing.
@AmnesiaRose: I wish I had the confidence to just randomly sit on people and start bathing myself like my cat does.
@KyleMcDowell86: HER: Im breaking up with u ME: Is it because I say "Uh Oh Spaghetti O's" when things go wrong? HER: Ya ME:(under breath) Uh Oh Spaghetti O's