@Home_Halfway: Hello everyone, this is your captain speaking. The plane's going down. Look, stop screaming, that's not going to make me a better pilot
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@better_off_dad: It took me 9 self inflicted ER visits, but that nurse finally realized it was love at first sight.
@bobvulfov: FRIEND: do u want to hang out this weekend ME: generic excuse FRIEND: did u just say "generic excuse"
@apparentlysmart: Lois Lane was fired from the Daily Planet after she knocked Clark Kent's glasses off and then panicked thinking a plane was in the building.