@Ivsy01: Her: I like how you did your hair today. Me: OMG thank you, I passed out in my closet last night.
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@_SingleBabyMama: My 3yr old lost her mind because I apparently hurt her doll's feelings. I swear I've been nothing but polite to that doll but now it's on.
@Book_Krazy: *Ok, don't let them know you're a dog* Him: The job is yours. Here's the keys to your new office. [tosses keys] *catches keys in my mouth*
@le_buns: they probably named the Rocky mountains first and then saw all the other mountains and were like "oh"
@WittySassBasket: *sharing a box of cereal with the cat* Me: Frosted Lucky Charms Cat: They're magically deliciOH, uh MEOW