@notfaizzy: ...her name was April, and her only son went on to become a comedian but everyone just called him: April's fool.
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@noog: If I had Pokemon, I’d pretend to understand them. They’d go “Bulba bulbaaasaur” and I’d be like “What do u mean Hitler did nothing wrong?”
@awildhope: On the phone to the chinese food place & my cat's all chatty... I cover the receiver and hiss "Shhh, you want them to hear you?"
@U_Want_Shum_M8: My 5 year old brother said "when I'm older I won't have a GF, I'll live on my own like my big brother" YEAH CAUSE THAT'S TOTALLY A CHOICE