@radtoria: Hey baby, do you like tan lines? Because I fell asleep with a badminton racquet on my face again and
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@RidiculousSheri: He died doing what he loved, annoying the hell out of me and not believing I would stab him.
@shutupmikeginn: If you get engaged and you and your partner both owns dogs do the dogs become brother and sister or are they married too?
@radtoria: Cute guy: Is this seat taken? Me: (ok, play it cool) No. *smiles* Him: *takes chair away*
@SortaBad: My college girlfriend texted me for the first time in 10 years this weekend and I'm 1 million percent sure this is Adele's fault