@NakedWhiteAss: Hey guys, which cell phone provider drops the most calls? I need to get one for my mom.
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@GrantTanaka: at my funeral, I need one of you to stand up and ask if you can have your toaster back
@robfee: How to make the World Cup more exciting: Refs are on stilts The ball screams when kicked Kissing is legal 1 player gets to use a car Snakes
@alispagnola: There are many different theories about why humans even need to sleep but I'm pretty sure it's to charge our phones.
@prozdkp: Mitt Romney dissing Trump is like when an anime villain from the previous arc teams up to help stop the new billion times more evil villain