@mrtruthandsoul: Hey guys with your phone in a hip holster, is it because your purse is too full with tampons?
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@matt___nelson: "If anyone knows a reason why these two should not marry, speak n-" SHE ONCE COMMENTED 'FIRST' ON A YOUTUBE VIDEO *ring bearer vomits*
@SteveKoehler22: Blonde in laundromat asks to have a sweater cleaned. Attendant : "Come again ?" ( not hearing ) Blonde: "Nope, Just mustard this time"
@GoddessTitty: Going to get a facial today... this guy on Craigslist is offering a way lower price than the salon!