@Travon: "Hey Hillary what color do you think this dre-- never mind" - Bill Clinton scrolling through Twitter last night
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@T_Bonezzz: CREATION OF MAN God: And as they age, they shall lose all the hair on their heads and grow more in their ears & noses Angel: Yes, my Liege
@TheTimmyToes: [finally rich enough to go to a tailor] "How can I help you sir?" One clothes please!
@flashember: Desperate, I pull a goose from my bag and throw it screaming into the bully's face. Gertrude, my biggest and angriest goose, destroys him.