@vladchoc: Hey look, Grandma! You made the cover of "Didn't Make Me Any Cookies Weekly" again. "What good is she to anyone?" it says.
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@andylassner: CNN reporting that CNN will be reporting something on CNN. Tune in to CNN for all of the up-to-the-minute stuff CNN is reporting.
@LindaInDisguise: I'll give up my thesaurus when you pry it from my frigid, frosty, frozen, cadaverous, lifeless, stiff, defunct extremities.
@MythicPicnic: Home alone tonight The fridge is making weird noises I think the beer wants out....
@robdelaney: Enrages me when I see guys using cute dogs to pick up chicks. It's like, why did I have kids.