@vladchoc: Hey look, Grandma! You made the cover of "Didn't Make Me Any Cookies Weekly" again. "What good is she to anyone?" it says.
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@CoolCamel69: Son, I found some drugs in your backpack "Dad I swear they're not mine" DAMMIT SUSAN, THEY ARENT HIS. 1st time we were proud and you blew it
@PaperWash: Paul is coming over tonight Paul smith or Paul who puts ketchup on everything? [car pulls into driveway covered in ketchup]
@KeetPotato: lawyer: "my client claims the altercation began because - and i quote - "he came at me sideways" crab: "in my defence.."
@RandiLawson: Fear does not exist in this dojo, does it? NO, SENSEI! Gluten sensitivity does not exist in this dojo,does it? Put your hand down Aiyden