@HeroineAddict: Hey, people who use crystals or all-natural products instead of deodorant: You don't need to keep informing us. We know.
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@bluetractor: I hate it when people call me judgemental Especially people wearing shoes like that
@wesjohnson8: "What am I supposed to do with this speeding ticket?" Officer, "Keep it, when you collect four of them, you get a bicycle."
@jackmackenroth: My bank says my password isn't strong enough. Did it ever stop and think that my password has a lot going on right now?
@TheDairylandDon: [drops capsule in woman's drink] Maybe when that's finished, we can get out of here? [green sponge dinosaur grows out of glass] Ready to go?