@LizHackett: Hi, famous people getting DUIs. You know you can probably afford a driver, right? Just a thought.
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@girlontapas: I tried to let the wine breathe but it needed mouth to mouth. So who's the hero now?
@toastymoe: Bad news: I got so busy drafting tweets, I forgot to pick the kids up at school. Worse news: I'm a bus driver
@Carbosly: It's a plant shaped like an egg. EGGPLANT! It's a place where we make fire. FIREPLACE! Diving in the sky. SKYDIVING! Humans are creative.