@FrazzleMyGimp: [hiding my girlfriends Christmas present behind my back] remember how you said we were out of milk
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Elizasoul80: Me: "I came to Twitter to be creative and express myself." Twitter: lol, you said "came".
@pleatedjeans: U can give out anything on Halloween it doesn't have to be candy last year I gave a kid my cable bill it was awesome he paid it & everything
@DiamondLou69: I was eating BBQ ribs and my waitress asked me if I wanted a wet nap... ...I told her it wasn't necessary because I had one earlier today.