@Underchilde: Honk all you want, but if I don’t eat these donuts at this green light I’ll have to share them at home.
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@WilliamAder: Arrogant Co-Worker: Do you have any idea how many years of education I have? Me: Don't feel bad, I got held back a couple of times myself.
@juliussharpe: People used to go all around the world for spices. That must have been underwhelming. "Guys, I've been gone three years and this is cumin."
@rockymomax: SNAKE: im gonna bite you SNAKE CHARMER: u are so sexy S: wha- SC: *presses finger to lips* still wana bite me? S: *blushes* well not anymore
@slytherinstef: So I didn't stab the idiot who knocked over my entire coffee- Does that sainthood thing start like right away or...