@_youhadonejob1: Hope I got my ticket....
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@moose_chocolate: Super Mario Brothers left me with highly unrealistic expectations of how exciting a career in plumbing would be.
@SteveSuckington: [GOP Debate] MODERATOR: this question is for Senator Cruz. How will you handle zodiackillersayswhat? CRUZ: what? MODERATOR: I knew it!
@Marlebean: Kid... Me... Kid... Me... Kid... Me... Kid: You didn't sew the hole in my bunny Me.. Kid.. Me: It's 3:07am Kid: So are you gonna sew it now?