@curlycomedy: How can you teach your child about adversity if you don't leave a diaper unchanged once in a while?
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@Eightinchgoat: Some dude just asked if I was "herb friendly". I told him I like basil and dill and he walked off. Guess he didn't have thyme to discuss it.
@TheDjinnTrials: Customer: Why do you own a hot dog stand when you draw and write? Me: Wanna buy my book? Them: No. Me: That's why I own a hot dog stand.
@feasibleweasel: [At the first thanksgiving] Pilgrims: Im thankful for the land you gave us Natives: we didnt give you land? Pilgrims: *winks at the camera*