@curlycomedy: How can you teach your child about adversity if you don't leave a diaper unchanged once in a while?
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@SatansTongue: He told me he wants my heart "Sharon I'm pretty sure he's a serial killer" No way! *later on with guy* Wow you're really into bondage huh?
@freeDone01: My body is telling me to go to sleep but my brain knows that there are Oreos in the pantry.
@HaramiParindey: Interviewer : What are your expectations? Me : Job. Interviewer : I mean what do you want from this job? Me : Salary
@DanMentos: "Hello?" Dad come get me from practice "Sorry I'm going into a tunnel" *sound of mom giggling* But I called the *connection drops* …landline