@RobotThomas: How come Yoko Ono didn't marry someone from Nickleback instead?
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@iGreenMonk: Someone just saw me trying to take a picture of myself and now I have a dead body to bury.
@Dutch_50: Hey, I'm human. If you cut me do I not bleed? If you cut me a slice of pizza do I not eat?
@Dawn_M_: I wrote "except zombies" on my welcome mat so I know I'll be safe during a zombie apocalypse.
@awkwardphilippe: HER: deeper ME: I can't do it captain, the thrusters are already at full power HER: get off me