@Brentweets: How dare you incinerate that I don't know big words.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ceejoyner: If you don't like your son, grab a football and tell him to go long. Never throw it. He's gone now.
@kellyoxford: Cyclists who don't obey street signs should have to wear their google search history on a t-shirt.
@InternetHippo: “What attracted you to our company?” Well, I heard you pay money in exchange for work
@abbycohenwl: Mama Bear: Ok but last time Papa Bear: Thanks, babe [she puts on a Goldilocks wig] Mama Bear (falsetto): I can't sleep here! It's toooo hard