@1followernodad: How do I like my eggs? Umm in a cake.
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@ChrisStokdyk: Do you ever wake up, look yourself in the mirror and say, "My God, I look like a pillow" ? If so, that's not a mirror - it's your pillow.
@underchilde: Three Most Insane Extreme Sports: 1. Solo Climbing 2. Running of the Bulls 3. Family Reunions
@jake_lach: Dog ate raw chicken so I called the vet to see what I could do He asked what I think they eat in the wild. Basically, he called me an idiot
@TheToddWilliams: Kid: WAAAHH! MY TOY IS BROKEN!! Dad: Nothing a little duct tape won't fix... Kid: mfflr..frrrr..strnnn