@1followernodad: How do I like my eggs? Umm in a cake.
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@daemonic3: Ok I won't subliminally ask any more subtraction problems, but I only did it 6 or maybe 3 times. What's the difference?
@DrunkSocialite: My dream is to become the first smart person to be interviewed by a newscaster live at a scene.
@GuttaLikeNoOtha: My son: Mommy I can't wait to grow up and be a man. Me: Don't be silly son, you can't do both
@causticbob: I failed my audition as Romeo through a misunderstanding over a stage direction. My copy of the script said: 'Enter Juliet from the rear'