@HanaMichels: "How is this grilling you?" - mom's 44th question
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@Kyle_Lippert: Just saw a dude catcall a woman with "Nice heels, girl" and his friend slapped him and said "Those are knock offs, bro"
@MarlonBrandNO: Wife: Have you seen my stilettos? Me [6 inches taller and struggling to stand]: Uh *stumble* No
@Rollmaninoz: *Rolls window down* Cop: do you know why I pulled you over? Me: is it because I’m literally running down the street pretending to be a car?
@doublewenis: Hey...quick question, fellas: Does it still count as leg day if you just shaved them?