@serialmatrix: How many bears would Bear Grylls grill, if Bear Grylls could grill bears?
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@AmishPornStar1: Do you like long lines, mass transit and sweaty white people? Ask your doctor if a Disney trip is right for you.
@kumailn: "Every family on 2013 had 'quite the year'." - study conducted using Christmas newsletters
@kelkulus: While it may be physically possible to have a baby after 40, forty children are probably enough.
@GABBYdaAngSaya: Boss: I suspect one of you is dead [Everyone looks at me, except for Paul, who is not moving at all]