@the_blacklisted: How many coffees before I stop looking for shirts in my refrigerator
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@SamuelHLowe: If you're ever on death row, request Denny's for your last meal so you can live an extra year waiting on your order.
@ValeeGrrl: Me: Ready for school? 7yo: [in only underwear with pants tied around his neck like a scarf & a sock on each hand] Almost
@okimstillhungry: Me:*typing furiously* I've bypassed the firewall and I'm hacking into the mainframe now Arby's customer: So is my order placed or not Me: No